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View Full Version : Glad to be a guy



Admin
11-28-2007, 01:07 AM
So you??™re glad you??™re a chick? Well, I??™m glad I??™m a guy. So have a seat, missy, and I??™ll tell ya why I??™m so glad I??™m a man, I could stand and applaud That I don??™t have to live life as a broad. We do the same work, but I??™m better paid. There??™s honor and not shame for me when I get laid. I can get head in a restaurant booth. Mechanics will (usually) tell me the truth. I can go sit at a bar all alone Without twenty drunk losers inviting me home. Workmen and service men never do hassle me. Car CD players don??™t simply baffle me. I can reach stuff hidden on the top shelf. I can change light bulbs all by myself. No one expects anything when I just flirt. I don??™t have to wear dumb stuff like hose or a skirt. My underwear??™s cotton, and three for eight bucks. Bras are expensive and WIRE - that sucks. I get to buy cool stuff like hammers and drills. You have to buy makeup and birth control pills. Never will I suffer from PMS. It takes me ten minutes to shower and dress. Three pair of shoes are more than enough. I don??™t have a purse full of useless old stuff. None of my co-workers can make me cry. When someone fails to call, I don??™t give a shit why. I never will need an electrician or plumber. I can date someone much younger and dumber. I??™m GLAD I??™m a guy, with two balls and a dick, So I don??™t have to live life as a chick. I revel in guy-hood with joy I can??™t squelch, And I??™ll celebrate every scratch, every belch. I??™m glad I??™m a man, of that I am proud. I??™m not at all bitchy, annoying and loud. I won??™t try to squeeze in jeans three sizes too small. My credit card is still good when I leave from the mall. I won??™t drink Diet Coke, or eat a rice cake. There??™s no silicone here, my chest isn??™t fake. My face isn??™t ???lifted,??? my bra isn??™t stuffed, I do what??™s proper, I leave the toilet seat up. It doesn??™t take hours to fix up my hair, I don??™t see the need to use bathrooms in pairs. I won??™t throw a tirade and then blame PMS. I??™m a man and I??™m glad I can deal with my stress. I have intuition, I never get lost. I share household duties, I won??™t try to be the boss. I??™m a man and with that comes a high sense of class, I won??™t wear a swimsuit that rides up my ass. I won??™t cry like a baby when Bambi gets shot I don??™t make up false places, like the infamous ???G-spot.??? I won??™t go out at night in a black mini-skirt, then slap anybody that just tries to flirt. You crazy women scare me, you have lots of gall, To make Lorena a hero for hacking off balls. Yes, I??™m pleased to be male and I don??™t mean to gloat. I??™m sorry you don??™t understand how to work the remote. I??™ll never tease you, or play hard to get. If I don??™t get my way, I won??™t throw a fit. I don??™t worry much about breaking a nail, My face without makeup isn??™t distorted and pale. I??™ll never say one thing while meaning another. When life gets real hard, I won??™t run to my mother. In order to understand just who I am; You need a Y-chromosome; it??™s what makes you a man.