Reply With QuoteI said to my wife “There’s only one thing that scares me during Halloween.”
She said: "Which is?"
I said: "Exactly"
After many years of marriage, I think my wife still finds me sexy.
Everytime I go past her in the house she says, "What an ass."
I said to my wife “There’s only one thing that scares me during Halloween.”
She said: "Which is?"
I said: "Exactly"
My therapist said to write letters to people I hate and then burn them.
I did that but now I don't know what to do with the letters.
My wife texted me this morning and said, “Your great”. I replied, “No, you’re great”. She’s been in a great mood ever since.
I should correct her grammar more often.
My girlfriend wants to break up with me because she says I am unAmerican.
I could see that coming a kilometer away.
No Wi-Fi, Pretend it’s 1973
The coffee shop has a sign that says, “No wi-fi, pretend it’s 1973”…
So I paid ten cents for my coffee and lit a cigarette.
Ocean Leaks
Why doesn't the ocean leak?
Because it has Seals.
If I had a nickel for every woman who found me unattractive...
Eventually women would find me attractive.
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