A woman needs only four animals in her life:
- a mink on her back,
- a jaguar in her garage,
- a tiger in her bed,
and a jackass to pay for it all...
What do you get when you play a country song backwards?
You get your house back, tractor back, wife back, and dog back...
A woman needs only four animals in her life:
- a mink on her back,
- a jaguar in her garage,
- a tiger in her bed,
and a jackass to pay for it all...
Denis Leary: Laptops May Lead to Impotence
Laptops may lead to impotence. Yay. Im buying my daughters boyfriend an Apple MacBook first thing tomorrow morning.
I always hated weddings because the elderly would come over and poke me saying "You're next.".
They stopped doing it when I started doing it to them at funerals.
'A lot of people are wearing t-shirts with pictures of people that inspire them to do stuff. I wear a picture of my son cause no one inspires me to work harder than my son. Its also a constant reminder to wear a condom.'
Wife: Why do you go out in the balcony, when I start singing.
Husband: Because the people would think I am beating you.
A husband and wife were trying to set up a new password to their computer.
A husband, "Put 'MYPENIS' " and the wife fell on the ground laughing cause on screen was error, "Error. Not long enough."
lol, lol, lmao!!
Cool Morals:
1. Money is not everything. There's also MasterCard & Visa.
2. One should love animals. They are tasty too.
3. Save water. Drink beer.
4. Studying is healthy. So leave it for the sick.
5. Books are holy. So don't touch them.
6. Love your neighbor. But don't get caught.
7. Every one should marry because happiness is not the only thing in life...
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