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  1. #231
    SadMan's Avatar
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    Smile Happy Horses

    Why were the horses so happy?
    Because they lived in a stable environment.

  2. #232
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    Default

    I lost twenty pounds. Unfortunately, I was in England at the time.

    A husband is living proof that a wife can take a joke.

    The trouble with a three-day weekend is that it turns Tuesday into Monday.

    You think this is a free country until you move into a subdivision with a homeowners' association.

    If you want a new idea, read an old book.

    The only one of your children who does not grow up and move away is your husband.

    The trouble with doing something right the first time is that nobody appreciates how difficult it was.

  3. #233
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    Smile Celebrating the Holidays

    What do you say to your single friends on Valentine’s Day?
    Happy Independence Day!

  4. #234
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    Smile Competitive Salary

    ME: What does "competitive salary" mean?
    BOSS: It means your salary will be competing with your bills.

  5. #235
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    Default Another Toilet Paper Joke



    What did one toilet paper roll say to the other toilet paper roll?


    People keep "ripping me off"!


  6. #236
    SadMan's Avatar
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    Default


  7. #237
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    What's the difference between Big Ben and Tic Tok?
    One tells time, the other wastes time.

  8. #238
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    My boss calls me "the computer"...
    Nothing to do with intelligence, I go to sleep if left unattended for 15 minutes.

  9. #239
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    Smile Two Guitarists

    What's the difference between a rock guitarist and a jazz guitarist?
    A rock guitarist plays 4 notes in front of 1000 people, while a jazz guitarist plays 1000 notes in front of 4 people.

  10. #240
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    Smile Crime of Silence

    A friend of mine got kidnapped by a group of mimes...
    They did unspeakable things to him!

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